I am so thankful that today is Friday and is bringing this week to an end. It has been a really difficult week with the boys, but last night and today has been so much better and I am hoping that it will carry on into the weekend and next week. Last night as I was talking to Micah, I think I did make a realization that is helping me somehow. Everyone I have talked to has told me that, yeah, two was rough, but was nothing compared to three. This, of course, never ceased to encourage me when I was going through those terrible two stages. :) Anyway, as we were talking last night, though, I just realized, you know what? They are at a really hard age and everyone I know has only had one of them at that age--so, I am facing a really hard age with TWO at the same hard age!! Maybe I should cut myself a little slack.... Of course, it also helps that they miraculously seemed to turn a corner on a lot of the little things that we have been battling this week. In an effort to make sure that they are eating a little more balanced diets, we have been making them eat what we put on their plates. This has resulted in some very unpleasant evening meals, and I was all braced for that to happen again last night especially since I had made spinach, and then a mix of broccoli, carrots, and cauliflower for the vegetables. Micah was not very excited about the spinach either and to be honest, neither was I, but I had some fresh spinach that was going to go bad, so I thought I would saute it up with garlic. They were so excited about ALL of their vegetables and ended up having like 4 servings of each thing!! I couldn't believe it--just when you think it is going to be a battle, they come around and eat their veggies like champs.

And William pooped in the potty!! Apparently, he just needs privacy. On Wednesday morning, I was making him sit on the potty until he produced something and he wanted me to leave and shut the door, so I left, thinking I am hoping that something works. Well, sure enough, he did it and has continued to do it since then. I am so proud of him and so happy for me!! Of course, now the boys need "pribacy" for everything, so I am convinced they have no clue what it means. For instance, this morning, while William was having his privacy in the bathroom, Xavier insisted that he "needed pribacy." So, I said, why do you need privacy? He very seriously looked up at me, squinted one eye closed, pointed at it, and said, "my eye." They have no clue!! :)

I managed to get the house cleaned this morning. It always feels so good to have everything done and to have vacuum lines on the rug and carpet. I had planned to have some good scrapping time this afternoon while the boys slept, but it is an hour and a half into it and I have yet to even open Photoshop Elements. I am sure that it was all this technical stuff that I have done. Who knew loading a video on YouTube could be so difficult! I have had the hardest time finding the time to scrap this week. I am hoping that I will be able to get some done this weekend. I think that Micah was feeling my stress because he told me last night that he called his mom and asked her to watch the boys tonight so that we could have a little date, so I am looking forward to that.

Last night, I was talking to a lady from church who was just recently diagnosed with breast cancer and she asked me if I felt like my life was back to normal. I have spent a lot of time while cleaning thinking about this today. What is normal? Is my life back to normal? I didn't really have a normal life to begin with, so that also makes the question a bit difficult for me. I also received an email from a friend who has a family member with cancer and we were just talking about how once you receive a diagnosis, your life really never returns to normal. You obviously move past the moments of treatment and wondering if the treatment is working on the initial cancer, but I don't know when or if you move past the wondering if the treatment is still working. For those of us who have lived through cancer and are cancer free today, we are so incredibly thankful for all that God has done for us, but we also will live the rest of our lives with the knowledge that that cancer might return. I have written several times about how psychotic I can feel when I start to wonder if every little ache and pain is a recurrence, and I have talked with enough other survivors to know that I am not alone. I know that I can't live my life in fear and I really don't feel like I do, but I also know what the reality is as well. The reality is that we are not guaranteed anything. So, what did I say to my newly diagnosed friend? I told her that yes, your life does regain a sense of normalcy, but that cancer will change how you view life and that there is a new normal after cancer.

Wow! this is a really long post today.....lots of thoughts on my mind! One more thing, today is one year since my sister and Brian met their sweet little Rory for the first time. She has posted the videos from their time in Korea on her blog and if you haven't seen (or if you have), you should definitely go and check them out, because they are just precious!


brian said…
Just finished reading your blog posts for the last several days. Don't worry, these days will pass and one day just be a memory. The boys will be fine and you will survive it. Do you remember when Camden would sit in his room and just scream for more than an hour? He grew out of that...of course, he has found new ways to make us lose our minds. God blessed you with 2 boys because He knew you could handle it. So embrace the insanity!
Amy said…
The video is precious! They are too cute and definitely energetic. Don't you wish you could bottle some of that energy? I don't know how you ever get anything done. With that kind of adorable entertainment, who needs tv?

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