It started as an ordinary day

Yesterday started as a pretty ordinary day for me.  I got up, had some quiet time, the boys got up, we got dressed and ready for the day, I dropped them off at a friend's house while I headed to Tulsa for a doctor's appointment....my regular/routine three month appointment with my oncologist.  The one where I go in, have bloodwork, he does an exam, asks if I am having any problems, tells me my bloodwork looks great, gives me a hug, and tells me he will see me in three months.  Except that yesterday, he didn't tell me that my bloodwork looked great, he told me that my alkaline phosphatase levels were elevated and that he wanted to order a bone scan for today. 

Deep breath....okay.  

He reminded me that I had just had a PET scan about 6 weeks ago that was clear, so he was confident that this was going to be fine, he just wanted to get it checked out.  Then, as he was listening to my lungs, he tells me that my heart is beating kind of fast....well, yes, it is--because I just 'heard' you say you want to check my bones to see if cancer has mysteriously appeared there.   And if I have learned anything about doctors in recent years, they only seem to do things immediately if they are concerned themselves.  If you can wait a few weeks for the test, then they aren't super concerned, and he was being very insistent that it happen today.

Before I go on, let me just say that my scan was actually done yesterday and all was good.

So, anyway, as we were talking, his nurse poked her head in the door and said that she had talked to the nuclear medicine department and they could get me in right thenSo, I headed out the door to try to find that department in the hospital across the street while calling my friends who were watching the boys since my short morning at the doctor was turning into a several hour ordeal.   For bone scans, you have to go and get and injection, wait 3 hours and then go for the actual scan.  My one good vein in my right arm got an extra workout yesterday as I went twice for bloodwork and then my scan injection.  Then, I headed back to our town to collect my boys, talked to Micah for a few minutes, leave the boys with my mother in law and head back to the hospital for my scan.  While I was driving back to Tulsa, the song by Laura Story "Blessings" came on the radio with these lyrics:

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

And I begin to think,  'well, it is super easy for me to look back and see how there were many blessings through my diagnosis 4 years ago, but seriously, God, have you looked at our family recently? this is not an ideal time for this to happen.'  Then, I was reminded of literally the night before when I was sharing with my Wednesday night women's group about Psalm 103 and how it had become my Psalm through my diagnosis and treatment:

Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy name, 
Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and forget none of His benefits

And so, I had to start naming all of His benefits.  My family, my boys, childcare, my salvation, God's love and grace, etc.....

I just kept thinking over and over about how this was supposed to be just an ordinary day and as thankful as I am for a clear scan, for an immediate scan (which is often unheard of), as well as a report from the scan that came literally an hour and a half after it was finished (which is even more unheard of)--as thankful as I am for all of that, I was reminded that life isn't ordinary, at any moment, the ordinary can become life changing, and as often as I think that I have 'learned' to take it all as it comes, it is a process that will probably not be complete until this life is over.  Before I left the house to go back for my scan, I could see that Micah was concerned and we said what we have said over and over and over again...."whatever happens, we are fine, we are good, nothing changes."  

And it's true.  God is good, He is faithful, and we can trust Him.

Comments

Melissa said…
seriously just need to learn so much from you.
Jane said…
Well my friend, talk about making my heart drop! I'm so glad everything is okay. You were on my mind all day yesterday ... Lo is back in the hospital and when my mom called me from dialysis, her blood pressure was 70/40 and her HR was 145. Sheez. As I was driving to the hospital, all I was thinking about was how the alphabet was really long and could some good things please begin to fall around the DE area because the Derbys and the Detrichs have seen enough bad lately. :) Sounds like they did happen in a funny way. :)
Anonymous said…
God is good!
Mom...all the time.
Anonymous said…
Was I praying for you yesterday, extra much. I think so! And Melissa also. Yes, God is good, all the time!
Gma E
thehsmomof3 said…
Just last week I heard the "Blessings" song, and God stopped me in my tracks very unexpectedly. I felt compelled to sit in my car and just listen...something I never do. Now you share the same thing.
Isn't it beautiful to see how God weaves even our challenging journeys in a way that demonstrates his love and power, encouraging and strengthening us personally at the same time. I'm so thankful! Thanks for sharing, my friend.
-- Sherri
The goosebumps that popped up when I started reading haven't disappeared yet!! I am glad you didn't make us wait until the end of the story to know the outcome. What a day! Thankful for a good report, thankful for lessons He continually teaches us, thankful for the testimony of you and your beautiful sister. Sometimes when I read your blogs I feel like I am sitting at the feet of Jesus.
Amy said…
Oh, Becky!! My heart almost stopped when I began reading this post. I'm so glad everything came back clear and I am so sorry that you had to experience such a scare. Do they know why the level is elevated? I'm so so thankful that you are okay! Love you, my friend!!
joelsgirl said…
I just want you to know that when I think about Jesus, I feel like I know him better because I know you. I can't believe i was all chitter chatter blah blah yesterday and you didn't interrupt and say OMGOSH, WHAT HAPPENED TO ME IS SO MUCH MORE IMPORTANT! Because it totally is. I'm so glad it turned out okay, and I am blessed to call you my friend.
And I love that blog comments allow me to say that to you out loud, lol.
Monica said…
I can't hear the song "Blessings" without bawling through it. So sorry you had such a major scare. Time seems to stretch into eternity while waiting for tests and results, doesn't it? I've been praying for Melissa this week. She's been on my mind quite a bit. Love you, girl!
listgirl said…
I read this and my heart started beating faster as well. I'm so glad your scan came back okay! And I totally echo what Kellie said about knowing Jesus better because of you.

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